mercy not sacrifice

i'm glad i attended mass early this morning. not only because i was with my bestfriend but because the homily was good.

the priest talked about an experience in belgium that he will never forget. when he was doing his ph.d., he saw for himself that very few people go to mass unlike here in the philippines. sometimes, there will only be about fifteen old people attending sunday mass. how he boasted about being proud from the philippines, where churches get filled up to the brim, especially on sundays! and how sad it was to see few people being religious in that particular place in the world. his boasting had gone on for quite a while but then, his german friend probably got tired of hearing how we, pinoys, fill the churches on sundays and how religious we are that he answered back:

"people here, when they are hungry, they have something to eat. when they feel cold, they have something to wear. when they are thirsty, they have something to drink...

(sort of the beatitudes, huh?)

in this country, we take care of our own. tell me if that is the case in your country, tell me. tell me, isn't that religion?"

most of us at church woke up at that question, too. just like the priest was and told that. yes, they may not attend mass all the time but they take care of our own. Do We? i guess not. everywhere you look, there's poverty but i guess not all are willing to share nor help. ask me, and i'll tell you that i don't give alms. why? i'll say because there are a lot of bad guys out there. what if who you're giving alms for are part of a syndicate. how come these kids ask for alms? where are their parents? or if they are adults, i'll say: how come they won't work? they just sit there on the steps, waiting for grace to land on their outstretched hands. i worked hard for my money, why can't they? i am selfish, i admit. but isn't it against the law to give alms? i'd say there is a proper way to help the needy. share in the church. i'd rather donate to an organized fund-raising than to those who just help themselves by letting you feel sorry for them. i just hope to God that i won't experience that in my lifetime. am i bad christian for not willing to give to beggars?

i haven't heard it said before until today. the priest shared that mother theresa once said, "you do not give love the poor because you see in them Jesus. you give love to the poor because they are Jesus." may God forgive me for being selfish in that way. but times are not just the same as it was once in His time. today, there are opportunists who will bleed you dry. i feel guilty for feeling this way but i hope, i will be forgiven. am i being righteous?

Jesus also said that "i desire mercy, not sacrifice." He has not come for the righteous, but the sinners for repentance. may what i have written be an acceptable act of repentance for whatever sin i have done. amen.

for more of this passage, please read this.