stressed and afraid

i am too stressed out today. i found out that my supervisor had a meeting with the company president and the president commented that we were working so slow for this project i'm handling. i am afraid that my efforts for the last several months are not up to par and that it is lacking and incomplete. i am not blaming anyone but i guess my output is just as much as i know. as everyone knows, one cannot identify what one do not know.

i am afraid that i will be found lacking, or worst, be told that my work is not worth anything.

what if i get fired? if not fired then what if i get a thrashing from my bosses and i won't be given another chance to learn? as it is, with what i have, it's just like doing the work so i can learn and not doing the work to give a result.

i've been asked questions earlier today that i have no answers to, when in fact, it should have been me who could answer them because i am the one focused on that work. i feel so sad and so afraid i may not be able to deliver what they want on time. i'm running out of time....

*****

on a lighter note, other items for my Christmas wish list:

1. pajama set (coz i don't own one)

2. la senza lingerie :)